We are nothing without the ability to constantly evolve at a pace of our own design. For Merlot, this has meant spending the past five years sitting with herself and exploring her womanhood until she finally felt ready for a proper reintroduction. The last time we heard from the New York-based musician was in 2020 with “The Fall,” and now she’s back with “Butterfly,” a song dedicated to her transition as she boldly declares 2025 as “the year of Merlot.”
The track sees Merlot return to her roots, teaming up with fellow Berklee alum Jay P as the executive producer of a forthcoming project. Lead single “Butterfly” puts Merlot’s sultry vocals center stage alongside her other, more hidden talent: playing the saxophone, which adds a chic touch to the smooth, unbothered bop. “I can teach you how to fly,” she teases, casually flaunting all the “nasty” and “sweet” things she has to offer — and we’ll take them all.
Below, Merlot tells PAPER what she’s been up to and what’s in store.
Some time has passed since you last released music. What have you been up to during the break and what have you learned about yourself?
It’s been almost five years. I released my last song in June of 2020, during the height of early COVID days. The prolonged alone time gave me a chance to sit with myself in a way I never have, outside of the NYC nightlife of it all. It ultimately led me to the decision to transition, and I’ve never felt more blessed and at peace in my entire life. I love myself more and more everyday, even and especially when I’m curled up at home without all of the glam. Getting to know myself has been beautiful and crucial to making more and better music now.
In what ways is "Butterfly" a reflection of who you are right now, both personally and artistically?
The lyrics of “Butterfly” are a pretty obvious, cheeky metaphor for being a Doll. I wanted to come out of the gate swinging and I didn’t want to pretend that nothing changed since my last record. I knew once I got back in the studio that I wanted to dedicate at least one song to my transition just to get it off my plate and cleanse the pallet.
What did the studio sessions look like for making this track?
I returned to my roots, actually. I worked with a longtime friend I made at Berklee College of Music when we both attended back in 2014. Jay P is an amazing producer, and I knew I wanted to work with friends on this new project that knew me back when I was a half-baked drag queen in Boston. Making music is such an intimate thing to do in front of people. Fleshing out ideas, making mistakes over and over, and trying out new ideas for the first time is an incredibly vulnerable thing. I was so grateful to have him as an executive producer on this new project I have in the vault and I can’t wait to share more this year.
What does this song mean for you on a personal level? This is your first time releasing music as a woman and post-FFS (which looks fab).
Thank you. It’s a new era of music, but also of my life. This song marks the beginning of a part of my life in which I’m very young, even though I’m turning 30 this year. This song is kind of the anthem and dedication to that new era, and the other songs are a deeper dive and exploration into this new chapter.
It’s a new era of music, but also of my life.
You're playing sax on "Butterfly." Have you always had this hidden talent? I think more songs need sax solos, don't you?
It’s so funny because at one point in my life, I was a far more serious saxophonist than I was a singer. I studied saxophone privately for years in the past, and continued to play small solos all over the place in NYC. In my mind it’s very public, but I guess I need to break it out more. And lucky for you, there’s plenty more where that came from.
Do you still relate to songs you've previously released? We've written about quite a few here on PAPER over the years.
To be honest, I can’t help but get emotional when I think of my PAPER features from the past. I still very much resonate with all of it even if I don’t identify that way anymore. My old music is a part of my journey even if the themes don’t quite hold up. I wouldn’t be the woman I am today without getting those truths off my chest.
In Interview, you said you want to start documenting more dreams. Have you started?
I haven’t documented them, but I can say that my dreams are beautiful in the middle of the night and terrifying and bone chilling when I take a nap. I need a scientist or expert to chime in and explain why that is. Why am I always pregnant and losing the baby in my dreams when I nap?
You had a supporting role in Alexi Wasser's film Messy. That was my first time seeing you act, and I was so impressed. What do you remember most from that experience?
I can say that I do have a small role in another film this year, and I’m so, so excited. I’ve always flirted with the idea of acting, but having my first experience on an actual set was mind blowing. It was daunting, but I think I’m in love with the craft now. Also, I’m so happy it ended up in John Waters' and Lena Dunham’s “Best Of 2024” movies list. If any agent is reading this, I’m free and eager.
What more can we expect from you in 2025?
New music, new movies and total authenticity. I’m not diluting myself this year. Over-saturation is in. 2025 is the year of Merlot.
Photography: Spencer Clark
Makeup: Cyler Daigle
Styling: Gabriel Held
Hair: Dom Forletta
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