On Wednesday, October 12, the Swedish pop star released the music video for her new single "Grapefruit," where she relives the emotionally tumultuous experience through expressive choreography performed around a padded room and other areas in a dimly lit house, all while a moldy, uneaten grapefruit continues to rot in the fridge.
Taken from her upcoming Dirt Femme LP, the song's upbeat melody comes in a stark contrast to the video's dark visuals and equally as somber lyrics, in which she details her weight, body dysmorphia and calories restriction through lines such as “One, two, grapefruit / Wish I could change overnight / Three, four, lose more / Kill my obsession, please die / Five, six, hate this / How am I still in this fight?”
“I’ve tried to write this song for over 10 years. I know I haven’t talked about it a lot in interviews, or even in my music, which is my most honest place," Tove Lo said in a statement about the release. "I guess I had to find the right way to share the feelings and the vicious circle of behavior I was stuck in."
Since then, the star has gotten to a place where she has a healthier relationship with her body, though she did start thinking about the way her eating disorder took up "too many of my teenage years" during quarantine.
"Maybe the 2 years of stillness brought back memories, maybe I needed all this time I’ve been free from it to be able to look back without feeling pain," Tove Lo said, before talking about how used to feel the need "to crawl out of my own skin," as she "felt so trapped in a body I hated."
"It was honestly really hard putting myself back in that headspace, but it was necessary for me," she added. "I’m going to let the song speak for itself now.”
Watch the official music video for "Grapefruit" via Tove Lo's YouTube channel below.
If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, call the National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA) 24/7 helpline at (800) 931-2237.
Photo by Moni Haworth / Courtesy of Tove Lo
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