What You Missed Last Month in New York City (According to Linux)

What You Missed Last Month in New York City (According to Linux)

by Linux

This is What You Missed Last Month (According To Linux), in which nightlife it-girl Linux takes us behind the velvet rope and into the VIP section of Scene-City. Through her extreme (sometimes exaggerated) lens, Linux gives us the tea on what really happened at every party-of-the-century that floods our Instagram feeds. (A note from the author: don’t take what she says too seriously — she’s just a club kid after all).

Ah, June in New York: The month these five boroughs become somewhat of a capitalist war zone wrapped in glitter and slay.

The United Nations Headquarters on 42nd street replaces their worldly flags with those of the LGBTQ "agenda," while doing nothing for our international rights. Multi-generational Trattorias in Nolita armor themselves with "PRIDE" decor, yet charge over $40 for Cacio de Pepe (now that’s homophobic). Even one’s choice of rainbow flag has become a political position: "Why did you use that rainbow and not that rainbow?"

Sadly, besties, you are fooling no one, because I know all of you still eat at Chick-Fil-A!

But that’s just it: these days during supposed celebratory moments, it seems nobody wins and everybody’s loses. How did a time meant for unity turn into one grand debate? In 25 years, I have lived many lives and in turn identified (at one point or another) with almost every single letter in the LGBTQIA2S+. With all that experience I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s only one place on earth this community seems to get along: the club!

Nightlife in New York singlehandedly keeps our city’s trajectory for Peace, Love, Unity and Respect afoot. And luckily, Pride month always turns out to be the most party-filled month of the year. If it weren’t for the major-ragers that happened this month, I don’t know where the state of the LGBT would be.

There were so many siquening Pride moments this June in fact, that in order to hit them all, we’re going to need to do a first-of-its-kind, Pride Edition speed round. (And yes, I might’ve done actual speed in order to attend them all.) I won’t be giving you all the details on what you missed (I’m not an animal), just the ones that matter. Let’s go, gays!

Clothing and bag: Coach

June 1: Coach Party

On the first day of Pride, Coach started the month off right with an iconic party that literally everyone seemed to be at. It took place at Monster Bar in Greenwich, one of New York’s most iconic gay establishments. I had just shot a Coach campaign earlier that day, so I arrived a little late.

Upon walking into the party, the Coach-branded neon sign at the step-and-repeat literally burst into flames. (How festive!) Whoever did the party’s guest list deserves a raise, as every single model at IMG was in attendance wearing head-to-toe Coach. As with every Pride party this month, Aquaria DJ’d. All the ballroom girlies were there too, with Honey Balenciaga and Barbie Swaee nearly shutting down the party upon arrival.

Around 11 PM, PAPER cover star Saucy Santana came on stage with two people fanning him, and performed all of his hits. Creative Director Stuart Vevers was there early and stayed late. (Celebratory king!) Coach needs to throw more parties!

June 18: Ladyland

Ladyfag, queen of New York, took over Avant Gardner once again with her yearly festival Ladyland. It was a 5,000+ people festival with endless entertainment to match. Tory Stiletto opened the Mirage with their DJ set, followed by performances from Brooke Candy, Shygirl, Sevdaliza and Tinashe.

Even with all those icons, the night seemed to peak with Goth Jafar's 11 PM set in The Village. By 2 AM you could find bliss at the festival anywhere, with LYDO and Club Eat in one room, and Honey Dijon and Michael Magnan in the other. Altogether, Ladyland was a night of utter talent and vision. Brava Ladyfag, you never fail to treat us with your touch!

June 19: Doll! (at 3 Dollar Bill)

Bobby LeMaire, self-proclaimed "Brooklyn’s Stuntiest," celebrated what she knew best about Pride: the dolls.

"Doll!", a first of its kind "Trans Pride Revolution" celebrated trans femmes of all walks at Brooklyn’s 3 Dollar Bill. It was an entire cast of trans women... and I mean talented AF trans women: Zenobia, Magenta, Angel Au and Bobby herself gave shows. Jo Disco, Arra and up-and-comer June Weimar DJ’d. Nightlife it-girls Radical Pom, Gia Love, Blaire Spicer, Brazier and Nati hosted.

Girl, that’s a lot of dolls. With dolls comes gays and, in turn, the night became one of the best girls' nights a TS could dream of.

June 21: H&M Pride Party

Earlier in June my agent texted me that H&M wanted me to DJ their Pride party. The coin was cunt and I said "yes," but there was only one problem: I didn’t know how to DJ! Luckily, everyone on my payroll does, so after a few weeks of lessons with my friends I was ready to play the H&M Pride Party.

H&M took over an entire hotel for a Pride week pop-up in the LES right next to The Box and called it "Hotel Hennes" (that’s what the H in H&M stands for). The entire four-story hotel was transformed into multiple rooms perfect for any influencer’s IG post. I DJ’d (with my sound engineer Arra) mid 2000’s deep cuts, while models Emrata, the Dupont Twins and Richie Shazam posed for photos.

The night then moved next door to The Box, which H&M rented to throw the pop-up’s after party. We stan H&M in this house!

June 23: Madonna (at Terminal 5)

As we know, Madge has been a martyr for the gay community for decades. Sponsored by Viva Mac Glam and World of Women, Madonna threw a party for all of NYC to enjoy. On stage she was joined by Saucy Santana, Bob the Drag Queen, Laganja Estranja and so many more.

But I know you aren’t going to make me tell you all about my major night with Madonna all over again... you can read about all of that here. Still, you better come back afterwards and finish this roundup, I’ll know if you didn’t!

June 24: Herrensauna

After all this gay shit I really needed to rave. It was my night off, so I decided to treat myself with a nitty gritty night at one of my favorite clubs: Basement. Herrensauna, a Berlin-based techno moment originally founded by Berlin DJ’s MCMLXXV and CEM invaded Bushwick for one night only. Nights at Basement are usually good, but Herrensauna at Basement was legendary.

All night long, muscle gays in Carhartt and Brooklyn dolls in Balenciaga became one on the dancefloor to the pounding techno music. What started as techno by midnight, ended as gabber by sunrise. I don’t remember much from this night, just that I saw God behind my gas station sunglasses around 3 AM. Front left was a Dion Lee editorial and back right was a man-seeking-man orgy.

The Basement green rooms eventually became a support group for Berghain DJ’s and regulars alike. At 5 AM it was time to go home, but so many people were trying to order cars that Uber quite literally broke. All 70 of the leftover Herrensauna stragglers took the L train home together, out of breath from the night we all had.

June 25: Planet Pride

Avant Gardner was all the rage this Pride Month! Gay Shepherds of New York Ty Sunderland and Jake Resnicow combined forces to throw the most LGBT party of the season. They called it "Planet Pride" and sold out to over 5,000 people in only a few days. For the weeks leading up to the event, all of Gay Twitter erupted in pleas for extra tickets and list spots.

On the main stage, SG Lewis and Gallantis played EDM pop hits while Violet Chachki, Gottmik and Aquaria took over the stage at King’s Hall. At 11 PM, surprise pop star Kim Petras performed Slut Pop and "Coconuts." The production value was insane. Ty and Jake, when we going back?

June 26: New York Pride Parade

Ugh, this damn Pride Parade. What once was a Pride march showing the world "we exist" has turned into a 4D commercial spanning 20 city blocks and lasting six hours. Today, I’m not talking about the parade as a whole, that shit was wack. I’m talking about one float in particular: Susanne Bartsch (inventor of gay nightlife, you all should know this by now) had her very own float for the parade sponsored by Connecticut Tourism (stay with me here, lol) and filled it with over a hundred of her favorite club kids and nightlife stars.

At 3 PM, the it-kids piled onto a double decker bus with Susanne’s face and name plastered all over it. On the top floor, DJ’s Amber Valentine and Boyyyish played music through the speakers while others danced around them. CT Hedden heckled the straight parade-bystanders on a microphone. Amanda Lepore could be found nestled in the back, hiding from the blaring sunlight under an umbrella. I got second degree burns from sitting on the top floor’s black seats, which seemed to magnify the sun’s heat. Together, we all partied in the broad daylight as we drove through the greatest city in the world.

June 27: MonkeyPox Vaccine Line

I’m just kidding... but I’m not.

Photography and styling: Airik Prince
Art direction: Chris Correa
Models: David Alcocer and Gage Kalama-Florence
Clothing and bag: Coach
Leather accessories: Nasty Pig and Purple Passion