Lewis Capaldi May Quit Making Music Due to Tourette's and Imposter Syndrome

The Scottish singer-songwriter opened up to The Times this past weekend about how his ability to make music is directly affected by the challenges that his Tourette syndrome presents to his mental health.

Promoting his upcoming documentary How I’m Feeling Now, set for release on Netflix this week, the “Someone You Loved” singer revealed how his Tourette tics are “getting quite bad on stage now” and he’s “fucked” if he can’t figure out a way to “get on top of that.”

“It’s easier when I play guitar,” he adds. “But I hate playing guitar.”

Capaldi is also worried about fans thinking that his tics are a sign of drug abuse. He told The Sun magazine, “People have asked me directly, ‘Are you on drugs, is it cocaine?’ and I saw a few tweets knocking around after shows with people saying ‘He’s on drugs’ — and that wasn’t the case.”

The award-winning musician has expressed in the past how “extremely hesitant” he was of letting the world see a more vulnerable side of him in the Netflix documentary, but he recently admitted that filming for the Netflix documentary only served to worsen his anxiety and imposter syndrome.

Capaldi recalls a moment at The BRIT Awards where he did not think that people would want to take pictures with him. “I got out of the car and a load of kids are hanging out with cameras and I suddenly start telling myself, ‘Oh, it’s not for me, they don’t want my picture, they’re waiting for Harry Styles,’” he confesses.

In the Times interview, Capaldi discloses that making music is the only thing that triggers his anxiety and imposter syndrome. “Otherwise I can be fine for months at a time,” Capaldi tells the British newspaper. “Right now, the trade-off is worth it. But if it gets to a point where I’m doing irreparable damage to myself, I’ll quit.”

Photo via Getty/ Frank Hoensch