5 Things We Wish Fintech Bros Would Wear

5 Things We Wish Fintech Bros Would Wear

by Brendan Wetmore

The biggest shock wave to ever hit the fintech industry came Monday, and no, it wasn't in the form of some stock crisis or blockchain disaster: news broke that Patagonia might be shifting away from supplying its corporate sales customers with branded apparel.

Binna Kim, president of the communications agency Vested, expressed her surprise on Monday upon receiving a denial email when trying to order branded vests for a financial services client. Kim tweeted out a screenshot of an email reply from the reseller for Patagonia's corporate sales. The email states that while "Patagonia has nothing against your client or the financial industry, it's just not an area they are currently marketing through our co-brand division."

HuffPostfollowed up with Patagonia on Wednesday to inquire about the news, and received a confirmation from the company. Patagonia writes, "We recently shifted the focus of this program to increase the number of Certified B Corporations, 1% For The Planet members and other mission-driven companies that prioritize the planet. This shift does not affect current customers in our corporate sales program."

The classic Patagonia vest and quarter-zip, generic button-up and khakis combo has been dubbed by some as the "Midtown Uniform" — a warning sign to all in the vicinity of the wearer that they will try to talk to you about Bitcoin if you get too close.

In light of such devastating news — because let's face it, this is worse than when your ex Allison tried to crash your Hamptons trip with the boys — PAPER has put together a list of menswear spring 2019 alternatives to try for all those working in finance who weren't able to get their analyst's welcome gift in time.

The OG Bro

Prada spring 2019

The first look on our list is a relatively understated quarter-zip jacket that will surely serve as an upgrade from your gray fleece. It's sleek, it's Prada, it's black, and most importantly, it's logo-less. So chic.

Quarter zips, gilets and vests, upgraded bags and more are just the tip of the iceberg. Fintech bros who haven't heard of high fashion should wise up if they want that annual bonus to cover their last-minute trips to Fyre Fest. However, If this list hasn't helped, and you still crave your Patagonia fix, you can always just purchase a non co-branded item from the store. Beware, though — if a fellow bro gets too close, he might notice you're an imposter.

Photos via Imaxtree