Fat and All That is a new weekly column by Editorial Director Mickey Boardman in which he discusses his lifelong battle with weight issues and society's views on overweight people. He'll discuss fat-shaming, body positivity and everything in-between, while also taking us on his current journey to get healthy and find the ideal weight for himself.
My name is Mickey and I'm fat. I'm not plus-sized. I'm not curve. I'm fat. And for some reason, when I say that, people freak out. They immediately comfort me and say, "You are not fat! You look great! You're just a little chubby." I usually interrupt them to say that I wasn't fishing for a compliment or for someone to lie and say I'm skinny — really, I'm not.
If people don't try to argue with me they typically act shocked and yell "MICKEY!" Just because of the word fat. F-A-T, fat. If I talk about someone else being fat, then people really panic. I don't even mean me telling someone they're fat. I mean saying, "Oh that Joe Smith has gotten fat." Mayhem ensues. But if I can't talk about fatness, who can? I'm literally obese. I could lose 80 lbs, and still be considered obese according to the Body Mass Index chart.
I love body positivity, honestly I do. I say love yourself and flaunt it. Wear hot pants, boob tubes and sleeveless chemises if that's your thing. Or wear all black and cover up. Follow your bliss. But I'm just not into pussy-footing around about fatness.
I've been fat for most of my life. Or I've thought I was fat. Looking back, so many years I thought my life was ruined because I was fat, but I was really just 5 or 10 lbs overweight (which by my current standards made me a skinny Minnie). The amount of time I wasted being unhappy about my weight is astronomical. What a waste. Over the years, I've learned that nobody gives a shit if you're fat except you. Well maybe your mother cares, but no one else.
Yes, there will be some kids who tease you for being a chub, but they would just as soon tease you for another reason. They don't really care deep down about your weight.
And fat people are always worried nobody is going to want to hook up with them, but that's not true. Yes, there are gays who say "no fats or femmes," but they're just douche-bags, really. There are also a lot of folks who feel differently. I've had romances with the most gorgeous men of my life at times I've been my fattest. And I don't mean chubby chasers, although they can be fun too.
This column will be a place for me to talk about being fat and also to talk about trying weight loss and exercise. Just because I'm fine with being portly doesn't mean I wouldn't like to get healthier and fit into my clothes better. In fact I'm embarking on a fitness transformation. When it comes to makeovers, it's not my first time at the rodeo. Like a lot of overweight people, it's sometimes tough for me to lose weight but even tougher not to pack the pounds back on the minute I get off the diet plan. Similarly I can be the most gung-ho gym goer in the universe for a few weeks, and then I suddenly need to be dragged — kicking and screaming — when any form of exercise is involved.
So stay tuned as I chat about fat shaming, body positivity and my sometimes inspiring, sometimes guffaw-inducing fitness exploits. My goal on this mission is to show you that it's fabulous to be fat and ALL THAT.
Photography: Katie Levine