Celebrate Rihanna's Birthday by Acknowledging All the Ways She Is a Superior Human Being

For many, today is a holiday meant to honor our nation's presidents. But since our current president is doing all he can to ensure that our country burns itself to the ground, we at PAPER Magazine think it's more appropriate to use today as a holiday to celebrate someone far more deserving—namely, Robyn Fenty, who turns 29 today.

In celebration of the Barbados-born starlet, we are taking time to recount all of things that Rihanna can do that no one else can—or, at least the things that she can do better than anyone else.

Rihanna can walk on grates in sky-high stilettos without ever slipping and falling:

And she can parade down public streets using abnormally large glasses of wine as accessories without ever being stopped by police.

She can participate in the Women's March to protest Trump in an unspeakably stylish outfit:

And feed birds at 7:00 in the morning wearing Saint Laurent.

It seems like there's nothing we can do that Rihanna can't do better—except for maybe winking.

Splash photo via Owen Kolasinski/BFA.com