Best Transit News All Week: Uber is offering $5 flat rate UberPool rides between Williamsburg and Manhattan for every weekend the L train is effed up. Guess that means we don't have an excuse any more to avoid our friend's East Village "psych-rockabilly DJ night." -- Abby Schreiber
Best Nails: Nicki Minaj's. Oh, and let's not forget about her new $500K 15-carat engagement ring from Meek Mill! Yeah, there's that, too. -- T.Y.
Most Depressing News of the Week: The Apple vs. Android war has officially turned violent. Two roommates stabbed each other over an argument concerning the benefits of their cell phones. Stop. Just stop. -- E.S.
Most Creative Method of Censorship: A receipt. An
Israeli ultra-Orthodox Jewish news website used a receipt to censor Kim
K because she is a "pornographic symbol" who contradicts ultra-Orthodox
values. She was also only referred to as "West's wife" in the article. --T.Y.
Least Appreciated News of the Week: Ben & Jerry's is making ice cream beer, too. Everyone's freaking out over their 4/20 burrito blunts, but, come on, this is equally exciting. -- E.S.
Most Controversial Surprise Album Release of the Week: Young Thug's "Barter 6." A
naked album cover, a potential lawsuit, a last minute album-title name
change, and a sort-of leaked album make up what could be one of the best
debuts in rap history. Buy it now on iTunes. --T.Y.
Cutest Reptile of the Week:This tortoise walking with its elderly friend. The internet just can't get over it and neither can I: It's wearing a dress! -- E.S.
Best Thought-Provoking Critique: Martha Stewart on the Kardashian-Jenner clan