Today would have been Mark Twain's 176th birthday. Instead of celebrating this annual occasion by cracking open a copy of The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County or watching Jonathan Taylor Thomas and the late Brad Renfro in 1995's Tom and Huck, PAPERMAG decided to mark this special day by compiling the 14 most upsetting photographs of Mark Twain impersonators -- one of the weirdest lookalike genres behind Elvis and Sarah Palin -- we could find. So grab your laptop and hop on your raft, because it's time to take an odyssey with a bunch of white-haired weirdos.
"Hi, I wrote the great American novel. And I also dig rollerblading in Hermosa Beach" -- Blades Twain
"So Jim and Huck escaped the clutches of the evil...wait a second! Where'd I park my Ford F-150?"
Remember the episode of "Cheers" when Woody dressed up as Mark Twain? We don't either!
This Mark Twain looks like a character from "The Wire" who's been strung out on angel dust for the past few months.
"After Tom white-washed the fence, he discovered the theory of relativity." - Einstein Twain
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