(L-R) Fugazi, who are not at SXSW, despite the claims of evil wrongdoer Sadie Dupuis.

Even though her band, Speedy Ortiz, is playing eight SXSW shows in half as many days, Sadie Dupuis is somehow finding enough time to torment those of us who live in hope of Fugazi getting back together. In five tweets (so far), Dupuis has devilishly matched Fugazi's militantly anti-commercial reputation with SXSW's shark-jumping "brand activations." It starts subtly enough, but by the third tweet, with its breathless talk of the "Starbucks yurt," you're likely to feel gross about music festivals, Twitter and your own hopes and dreams, whatever they may be.

See the tweets for yourself, below. Clearly, Dupuis must be banned from Twitter, or legally bound to start a new account devoted to rumors of Fugazi playing inside a giant Four Loko can at Rock in Rio USA.

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