Every four years, the world comes together for two weeks to celebrate the otherworldly abilities and drive of the most athletic human beings on the planet. It's also a chance to see some of the finest specimens of humanity the globe can offer, operating at peak physical capability. The Summer Olympics, with their tiny bathing suits, clinging spandex, and yards of bared skin, are prime time to fawn, ogle, and lust over the superhumanly fit men competing. This year, we've rounded up 40 of the sexist athletes and pitted them against each other in a battle for the gold medal for Sexiest Male Olympian. Voting closes tonight--the poll is below, and all the FINE evidence of these sexy olympians is below for your viewing pleasure. May the hottest thotty body win.

The "Duh" Bracket

They know they're hot. You know they're hot. They're overwhelmingly swimmers. Go ahead and ogle--you know you want to.

Luca Dotto, Italy, swimming

If he's this hot on land, imagine him wet.

Conor Dwyer, USA, swimming

Perhaps there is something about black and white portraiture that really points up how ripped your torso is?

Matheus Santana, Brazil, swimming

As if abs weren't enough, he also has a really cute dog.

Tom Daley, Great Britain, diving

Yes, Tom Daley. We know.

Ning Zetao, China, swimming

Just drying off. Don't mind my penetrating gaze.

The Douchebags Bracket

Your sailors. Your water polo players. The men who's souls wear navy blazers and boat shoes unironically. Are they actually nice on the inside? Who knows and who cares? We just want to sit on their incredibly chiseled faces.

Rhys Howden, Australia, water polo

When you can wear seersucker and we still want to have sex with you, you're doing something very right, or very wrong.

Luca Cupido, USA, water polo

Our good sense is screaming "HELL NO" but our bodies say "America, FUCK YEAH."

Max Bouchard, Canada, diving

This Canadian diver is giving his best Blue Steel and has his own lifestyle website called mr-max.com. That's all we're going to say about this.

Peter Burling, New Zealand, sailing

This man's jawline and gold-medal confidence (on the left) would scream "hedge fund manager whose wife makes him shower after Scores" in a different life.

Ryan Lochte, USA, swimming

The Ur-Olympic Sex Idiot. Jeah!

Bad Boy Bracket

Tattoos, renegades, secret girlfriends, secret DJ alter egos: These are the deliciously dangerous dudes who always know where Olympic Village after hours are.

Troy Doris, Guyana, track and field

The triple-jumper representing Guyana is a world record holder and makes house and footwork tracks under DJ names Good Junk and allblack.

Ashley Mckenzie, Great Britain, judo

The " bad boy of judo" got interested in the sport after fighting over Pokemon cards (awww!).

Lacourt has the floppy hair and tattoos of every guy you wish were hooking up with at Union Pool at 3 A.M. (but really you're just eating guac in the corner crying).

Sun Yang, China, swimming

He's got a secret girlfriend, a reputation for intimidating opponents during warm-ups, and that six-pack. Sign us up.

Jan O. Jorgensen, Denmark, badminton

This sentient Raya profile rocks tats, rides motorcycles, and makes a lawn game look bad ass. #weardenimeveryday


Look, we all know swimmers are hot--they've got great abs and they strut around in tiny Speedos. But you know who's really fire? It's fencers. Full-coverage white bodysuited, feature-erasing-mask wearing fencers.

Enrico Garozzo, Italy

Frankly, we could have done an entire bracket dedicated to hot Italian fencers. But we restrained ourselves.

Alaaeldin Abouelkassam, Egypt


Daryl Homer, USA

We would cross swords with him any day.

Giorgio Avola, Italy

If Botticelli painted a portrait of Sufjan Stevens, this is what you'd get. Ciao, Giorgio!

Kim Jung-Hwan, South Korea

It's a shame the fencer's wire mask has to cover up such beautiful bone structure.

That one sweaty tendril!

Arms Bracket

Welcome to the gun show.

Rafael Nadal, Spain, tennis

It's all love and love all (see what we did there!) with Rafa.

Danell Leyva, USA, gymnastics

Leyva might also be in competition for "wokest" athlete, saying of his fellow lady gymnasts: "It's just so powerful to see women like that get praised the way that they do. That could just be the feminist in me, though."

Marcel Nguyen, Germany, gymnastics

The cutest baby. We just want to put him in our pocket.

Pascal Lussier, Canada, rowing

New rule: He can only wear tank tops.

Tony Parker, France, basketball

Speak French to us.

Legs Bracket

The finest gams from across the globe.

Andre De Grasse, Canada, track

Daddy long legs! And one of the fastest men in the world.

David Oliver, USA, track and field

Those thighs, tho.

Ashton Eaton, USA, track and field

He's a decathlete, which means there are ten different events to watch him stretch, flex, and impress.

More fly thighs.

Neymar, Brazil, soccer

Neymar's legs are a Brazilian national treasure.

Cute! Bracket

Just straight adorable.

Lee Dae-Hoon, South Korea, taekwondo

Your best friend's cute little brother vibes.

Sajjad Mardani, Iran, taekwondo

Eyebrows Cara Delevingne would be jealous of.

Marcus Watson, Great Britain, rugby sevens

We just want to pinch his cheeks (both pairs).

Uwe Gensheimer, Germany, handball

He's never seen shoes before! Adorable! Almost makes us forget handball is not a real sport.

Bassem Hassan Mohammed, Qatar, equestrian

Everyone makes passes at horsemen in glasses.

Daddies Bracket

Michael Phelps, USA, swimming

Phelps is already well on his way to training his son in the ways of swimming and social media presence.

Paddy Barnes, Ireland, boxing

The tiny Irish flyweight (we'll let you make your own leprechaun jokes) has an adorable daughter who's almost as big as him.

Zdenek Stybar, Czech Republic, cycling

That's one chill baby. (And one hot dad.)

Jordan Burroughs, USA, wrestling


Mikel John Obi, Nigeria, soccer


You've seen the entrants. You've stalked their Instas and lusted over their Twitters--now it's time to cast your votes. Who is the hottest person in each bracket? Vote below!

You May Also Like