Even if you're a back home baller, the holidays can still be a fraught, stressful time filled with prying relatives, eggnog hangovers and office holiday party embarrassments. But not if you're Miley Cyrus, the new Princess Elf of Christmas. Ms. Miley took to Instagram over the weekend to share a slew of photos of her trying on various cuckoo outfits, partying in pasties with her friends and riding a pizza. It's not even December 24th and Miley has already won Christmas.
Vagina floss? Check. Tinsel wig? Check. Elf hat? Check. Fake machine gun? Check. "I have no tits" clutch? Check. Cowboy hat that looks like it's made from an old Keystone Light box? Check, check, check. Time to hit Stefon's Christmas party, which, we hear, has everything.
On the 12th beard of Christmas, my true love gave to me: twelve pepperoni pizzas, eleven felt fedoras, nine dirty bongs, eight doggy earrings, seven nipple pasties, six fresh-rolled joints, five thong bikinis, four horse print onesies, three twerking dancers, two questionable tattoos and one bag of mo-oooo-llllllyyyy.
DJ TT on the ones and twos, y'all!
The holy trinity.
She sprang to her pizza sleigh, to her team gave a whistle, and away she flew like the down of a thistle. But I heard her exclaim, as she drove out of sight, "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"
All photos via Instagram