As 2016 drags its marble horror gates to a close, we look back on this chasm pocket of time with both woe and relief--relief that it's finally over. And while we've had worse years, and more terror is to come, we can all agree that Lindsay Lohan had a year. A true year.
Part-British, part-Greek, part-Turkish and fully transcendent, the accent captivated the world.
Lindsay (expertly) kept coy about her hodgepodge cadence, and managed to monetize it for charity.
Speak in your Princess Grace of Reno, Nevada way of speaking, all you want, girl.
Did I mention charity? Yes! Charity. Lindsay--evidently shaken by the searing hell of human atrocities we've seen this year--most heinously in the war-torn nation of Syria--decided to go full-on Angelina Jolie, and become an advocate for the Syrian refugee crisis.
She branded her accent, donating proceeds from the merch to benefit the Caudwell Children and The Disaster and Emergency Management Presidency of Turkey.
That nightclub in Athens? The actress--whose relationship with nightlife is...sordid--claims it was made as a celebration of Greece's continued welcoming of Syrian refugees, specifically fleeing the devastated city of Aleppo...
Aside from that, she donated...energy drinks...to Syrian refugee camps, because if there's one thing...no, never mind. She also visited camps and hospitals in Turkey--the country that's allowed the most refugees to seek asylum.
Never mind the theories that Lindsay was being paid by the Turkish government to make it look good! This was genuinely awesome of her.
Meeting With Putin
As a new Cold War looms with Mother Russia, Lindsay, apparently, had an agenda when she agreed to give a Russia TV network her first interview about her alleged ordeal with former beau Egor (a Russian native): she wanted to meet with President Putin.
Why did Lindsay want to meet with Putin, you ask?
Mediation on Russia's tampering with the 2016 presidential election? And our cyber war with them, in general?
Pleading with Putin to lessen the nation's abysmally tyrannical and violent anti-LGBT policies?