Leonardo DiCaprio--Oscar winner, staunch environmentalist, and pied piper of pu$y--graced the streets of Manhattan yesterday by doing what he does best: riding a CitiBike.

The legendary thesp took in the crisp amber early summer sunlight.

I'd like to think he and his posse have a group text where they send each other outfit of the day options.

"Match the hat with the shirt, bro."

I also don't believe Leo actually pedals on CitiBike; maybe one or two initial pumps, but he's mastered it in such a way where he's able to just cruise at one, manageable speed for the entire duration of his sesh.

Leo was also joined by--you guessed it!--a thin blonde female human.

"Mystery blonde."

What's NOT pictured is me following Leo and the mystery blonde on my OWN CitiBike, drenched in sweat and panting.

"I'll be right there, Leo! Don't mind me!" I laughed, coughing while watching their silhouettes disappear into the hazy, humid late afternoon sun.

"Wait up, Leo!" I yelled again, watching him as he rides his CitiBike off a pier, and out into the East River, and into the Long Island Sound, and into the Atlantic Ocean, farther and farther away, into the horizon.

You May Also Like