As the old saying goes, a cryptic, nonsensical tweet is worth a thousand words -- and a thousand blogs -- if the account tweeting also happens to have a little blue checkmark next to it...?

Okay, so maybe we got that one wrong, but seeing as how it's Friday and we're in a "fuck it all" mood, let's just roll with that intro and round up some of the most perennially absurd, DGAF celebrity tweets, from Ice T farting to Martha Stewart being supernaturally out of touch, so that, at the very least, you can feel a little less bad about that drunken "i h8 my boss!" tweet that got you called into HR.

Martha, you are hip.

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