On North Korea and Empty Threats

You admonished North Korea last week about dismantling their nuclear weapons program. OK honey, let me break it down for you, 'cuz you're an imbecile, and for some reason, a drag queen seems to have a better grasp of the situation than any of the military analysts working for you.

How the fuck is your broke, ignorant ass going to threaten anybody?

If you have the resources for another war, why not direct them toward finding Osama Been Forgotten?

Remember him? He's the guy in poor health who's hiding in a cave, yet still more agile and cunning than your whole army with its souped-up technology? His 9/11 attack was the reason we went to war with Iraq -- even though he's not Iraqi and had no ties to Iraq's government.

But you did manage to find another Muslim leader in a cave. He's been forgotten too. Remember Saddam? You deposed him. Now he can't cause the mass murder and torture of Iraqis anymore. Now the American soldiers get to do it! Yay!

At least we "won" the war in Iraq. Two years ago I saw you fly over to that battleship to proclaim victory. (The closest your duty-shirking butt ever got to combat.) How odd that the number of deaths increased after the war and it just keeps on growing. Your attitude toward these "casualties" is a little too "casual." Especially when they are dying for a "pack of lies," as that brilliantly feisty George Galloway recently put it.

But actually you can't really win the war against Iraq, which is a poor country that couldn't dispatch a WMD anywhere near the US even if it had one. Iraq couldn't get its paltry forces over to this country to attack us if the Iraqis wanted to. You can't even enforce a peaceful military occupation in the Middle East and yet you are considering a threat of war against North Korea?

Who's backing you up? Recruits are way down and the pimp-ass recruiters who target low-income neighborhoods are offering potential recruits tips on how to fake required high school diplomas and cheat on drug tests. The word is out on your mess, darlin'! Even uneducated folks in poor neighborhoods know that soldiers who go to Iraq ain't never comin' back. There's no exit strategy and even your fellow Republicans have denounced the poor planning of your military operations. There have also been accusations that you aren't even arming the forces with decent equipment. What kind of freak would even consider joining the army at this point? You're going to have to scour every corner of the nation to root out soldiers of the caliber of the perverted torturer Lynndie England.

Or maybe you lied about not wanting to reinstate the draft. What's one more lie to a dyed-in-the-wool fraud like you? I hope your bratty alcoholic daughters are forced to enlist.

And why the hell shouldn't North Korea and Iran feel the need to develop "nuke-ya-lar" weapons? You pegged North Korea and Iran as two cogs in "the Axis of Evil." Under the guise of "spreading democracy," you've thrown Iraq, Iran's neighbor, into long, bloody turmoil. What nearby nation wouldn't develop anything necessary to protect itself from you? And in your typically bullish style of diplomacy, you refuse to have one-on-one talks with North Korea. You'd make a threat first, before even trying to work your differences out? I'd expect this behavior from a schoolyard bully, not the "leader of the free world."

No wonder these countries are going nuclear. You've turned the US into a rogue nation and people of every country in the world know it. Too bad the people in this country can't seem to grasp it. 'Cuz you're doing it in their name and with their tax dollars.

Lady Bunny
Actress, DJ, singer/songwriter, comedienne, ho


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