On Friday, we received an intriguing invitation to submit ourselves to free treatments at the Lower East Side's Trendy Gems Day Spa. No ordinary day spa, Trendy Gems is a self-proclaimed "tongue-in-cheek response to the fad of new-age imagery and language in art" interpreted through health and beauty treatments. Their proposal states:

"Trendy Gems Day Spa is a premium pampering experience infused with the zeitgeist of post-mayan desire. A team of spiritual specialists will be on hand to imbue your 5th dimensional vessels with the latest in new-age hashtagisms. We carefully consider each client's media and membrane balances to assess the best options for core transformation."

Inside the pop-up spa, which was part of a week of performances organized by Animamus and located in the CULTUREfix gallery, Genevieve Belleveau hosted, welcoming guests by serving them tea, seating them on a white-parachute covered lounge, and fitting them with white plastic hats, which she said were "exclusive #garbagewave couture." Soothing minimal ambient sounds were provided by a DJ named Palmtrees Caprisun. The spa menu options included Second Life Iso-Immersion with Ariele Max, Non-Invasive Plastic Surgery with Angelina Dreem, Ass-Clap Therapy with Labanna Babalon, Mind Dynamics with Direct Message Music, and Tap Reintegration Manicures by Clara Carter for Beauty Today. In addition to trying out some treatments, we took photos. Check 'em out, below.