America Is Getting Its First Drive-Thru Weed Store (Thank God)
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America Is Getting Its First Drive-Thru Weed Store (Thank God)

It was the dankest of times, it was the least dank of times...

Even though we're living in potentially the greatest cataclysmic clusterfuck in the history of our country (don't @ me, civil war ghosts), at least we can count on our fellow Americans to get one thing right: LEGALIZIN' IT. It's easy to forget that the same night America voted to elect satan's own pumpkin man as the leader of the free world, four states made weed completely legal, and four more approved it for medicinal purposes. A quarter of Americans now have access to legal marijuana in 28 states, just when we desperately need it most!

If you're curious what the future looks like for the loudest states in the union, look no further than Colorado, who legalized marijuana for recreational use in 2012 and is debuting America's first weed drive-through! According Colorado's Post Independent, The 'Tumbleweed Express' drive-thru dispensary will open at the site of a former car wash in Parachute, CO next month. The town manager of Parachute reports that since they began issuing marijuana sales licenses in 2015, the good herb accounted for almost 30% of the town's sales tax revenue. The drive-thru is expected to do wonders for the local economy (especially the diners, amirite?). The Tumbleweed Express will, of course, be subject to very strict regulations by forbidding anybody under 21-years of age on the premises (including the back seats of cars), providing security and surveillance at point-of-sale, and ensuring that no weed is visible from outside the premises.

Enjoy your weed drive through, Colorado! We'll just be here, grinding our teeth and nervously shredding napkins as the world burns!


[h/t HuffPo]