In this weekly column, MC/DJ Hesta Prynn pairs pop culture stories with an original playlist.
The Emmys are this Sunday and they're kind of more exciting than the Oscars these days. Something PAPER writers are feeling less excited about, perhaps, is the new Britney single. It's tragic, yes, but arguably, Britney has historically put out the most consistently awesome music of all of the major pop stars. This week's Five 'n' Five highlights some of Britney's real winners with this year's Emmy favorites.
1. Lead Actress: Kerry Washington/Scandal
"Seal It With a Kiss"
Will Kerry Washington finally win an award? If you believe the critics, then probably not. However she is a favorite of Paper Magazine and lots of others. Similarly, "Seal It With a Kiss" is the song on Femme Fatale that I always wished would have been a single. In my mind it is.
2. Outstanding Drama: Breaking Bad
"Get Naked (I Got a Plan)"
How do you choose just one great song from Blackout, the first album where the music became dance-heavy and conceptual (and began to truly rival Madonna) just as Britney, the pop star, began fading from the public eye? Also on this record: "Radar," "Piece of Me," "Gimme More." Similarly, how do you choose one winner amongst a group that includes Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, Mad Men and Downton Abbey?? CSHSHSH!!! (Sound of me launching myself out the window/)
3. Lead Actor in a MiniSeries or Movie: Michael Douglas/Behind the Candelabra
"Circus (Diplo Remix)"
"Circus" is a totally fine song that I'm not mad at at all, but when Diplo remixed it, it became an awesome song. Michael Douglas is a totally fine actor -- I mean who could be mad at Gordon Gecko -- but when Douglas was remixed into Liberace? Honey, hold on to your fucking pinky ring.
4. Outstanding Choreography: Dancing with the Stars
"I'm a Slave 4 U"
Did anyone even know this was a category? Regardless, the award for Outstanding Choreography obviously must be paired with this song and, in particular, this video -- an amazing example of early 2000's music business extravagance starring Britney in her hey. It never gets old.
5. Lead Actor in a Drama: Bryan Cranston/Breaking Bad
"Toxic" is really just an exceptional song that is leaps and bounds above what every pop star put out in 2003 and, possibly, that decade. Toxic was produced by Bloodshy and Avant, the Swedish duo that not only wrote every awesome pop song that you love, but also makes up two thirds of Miike Snow. The parallels to Bryan Cranston's portrayal of our fave character of all time are unmistakable -- really just leaps and bounds above what every actor has done this year and, possibly, this decade. But I'm not biased, of course.