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Hamptons schmamptons. We're planning on staying in town for this upcoming glorious three-day weekend, and have put together a little guide for our fellow staycationers. Here are a bunch of things to do this weekend that we think sound like a real fun time.

FRIDAY, MAY 25th

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Luna Park Opens: Head over to Coney Island, grab a Nathan's hotdog and hop on the Cyclone rollercoaster (though not necessarily in that order) because the amusement park officially opens today. [via Luna Park NYC]

Moonrise Kingdom Opens: Even if you're not able to make it to the beach this weekend, you can live vicariously through the characters in Wes Anderson's new flick about two kids who fall in love and run away on a remote New England island. [via Moonrise Kingdom]

Cabin Boy at 92Y Tribeca: In which Chris Elliott plays a staight-laced recent graduate of Fancy Lad Academy who ends up working on boat called the Filthy Whore. Also, David Letterman is in it! [92YTribeca]

Simian Mobile Disco at Webster Hall:
Memorial Day Weekend: trips to the beach, BBQ cookouts, fireworks and...an electro dance party?  While it may not sound as patriotic as hamburgers and apple pie, what better way to kick off a long weekend than with a concert?  And, besides, you'll have an extra day to recover. [via Webster Hall]

Le Bain's Rooftop Opens: Make your first summer Friday count with a little afternoon drinking at Le Bain, which will be open every day starting at 2 p.m. for the rest of the summer. They're kicking things off today with DJ sets by Chris Baio of Vampire Weekend, Autobot of Flosstradamus and Full Nelson. [StandardCulture

Top Gun screens on the Intrepid: We cannot think of a gayer way to ring in Memorial Day weekend. Wait, yes we can! Here's our Fleet Week Fun Guide for the gay sailor. [PAPERMAG]

Burberry Sale: Since Memorial Day officially means you can start wearing white, why not head over to Burberry to stock up on a chic summer wardrobe?  They'll be having a sale where you can find items 30-40% off. [via Mizhattan]

Ben Sherman Sale: Ben Sherman is having a Memorial Day "Weekend Shirt Sizzler" sale, starting today through Monday, in which all shirts are 30% off. Shirts!

Warriors and Vertigo at IFC Center: What shall it be? A '70s cult classic about warring New York City gangs with names like The Turnbull ACs and the Gramercy Riffs, or a 1958 Hitchcock melodrama gem about a retired police detective with a crippling fear of heights? Thankfully, you've probably got enough time this weekend to see them both -- they're screening tonight through Sunday. Vertigo also screens Monday morning. Breakfast and a movie! [IFC]

Hot Mom U.S.A. at Glasslands: Per the flyer for this party featuring DJ sets by Shiftee and RX: "Guns. Gators. Babes. Bass. America. It's the 1st Annual Hot Mom USA Memorial Day Weekend party." We're scared/intrigued! [Via Glasslands]
 

SATURDAY, MAY 26th   


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Eat Your Way Through Rockaway Beach:
A few concessions opened last weekend at Rockaway Beach Club on the boardwalk, but things are in full swing starting today. Stop by for snacks from Rockaway Taco, Rippers, Comodore East, Motorboat and the Big Banana, Steve's Ice Cream, Caracas and mooooore. Here's a handy map. And don't forget the drinks! [Via Eater]

Max Fish: The Beach Bar at Asbury Park:
If you're headed to the Jersey Shore this Memorial Day weekend, check out the new Asbury Park outpost of legendary LES dive bar Max Fish. They'll be starting daily service over the long weekend and, in addition to libations, they'll have skee-ball machines, a pinball machine, shaved ice and a food truck parked outside. [via PAPERMAG]

Bike Fetish Day:
Held in Williamsburg, the 8th Annual Bike Fetish Day celebrates all things two-wheeled during a bike-friendly block party on Havemeyer Street. There will be a BBQ, specially crafted bike products for sale, contests, awards and more. An after-party at City Reliquary follows, with drinks courtesy of Brooklyn Brewery. [via Brooklyn Based]

Brooklyn Greenway Initiative Annual Spring Bike Tour:
Join the Brooklyn Greenway Initiative as they cycle along the 10-mile stretch for the Brooklyn Greenway, a planned bike and pedestrian route that will connect Greenpoint and Sunset Park along the waterfront. So exciting! [via Brooklyn Based]

5 Boro Picnic:
Marking the start of Governor's Island food-and-drink festivities, the first-ever two day picnic celebrating the five boroughs hosts over 20 vendors, including Jimmy's No. 43 and East Village Meat Market. There'll be live music, cook-offs and drinks from Sixpoint and the best part?  Transportation to-and-from the island and Manhattan or Brooklyn is free. [via Time Out]

Secret Project Robot Spring Kick-off Garden Party Gala Event
: The Bushwick gallery celebrates warmer temps with a garden party featuring performances by Black Dice, Extreme Animals and Call of the Wild. They'll also be serving up watermelon drinks and a BBQ to fill you up in between sets. [via Secret Project Robot]

Dance Africa Bazaar
: In conjunction with BAM's annual month-long Dance Africa series (this year marks its 35th anniversary), over 300 vendors from around the world transform the surrounding streets around the arts center in to a marketplace, selling African, Caribbean and African-American food, crafts and fashion. [NYCArts]

Eclectic Methold + Dirty Projectors' Amber Coffman
: Audio-visual mash-up wizards the Eclectic Method bring their magic to Brooklyn Bowl tonight with a DJ set by Dirty Projectors' Amber Coffman. [OhMyRockness]

Take This Papermag Art Crawl, As Recommended by Gary Pini:
Head over to the High Line to check out the new gigantic mural, "Brandon Many Ribs," by French artist JR. You'll spot it up around 29th Street. Then walk up to 46th Street and Eighth Avenue where the Art Production Fund is hosting an installation by Kiki Smith called "Chorus." It's made up of stained-glass stars spread throughout an empty lot and Kiki says the piece is "a tribute to Josephine Baker."

On the Upper East Side, the Metropolitan Museum of Art (1000 Fifth Avenue @ 82nd Street) has a cool new temporary-architecture work by Tomas Saraceno called "Cloud City." The rooftop installation is composed of lots of interlocking geodesic pods that can can walk around in and get a great view of Central Park. Also, if you haven't already gone, Tom Sachs "Space Program: Mars" over at the Park Avenue Armory on Lexington and 67th Street is a must-see.

Over in Long Island City, PAPER's Monica LoCascio -- along with Daria Brit Shapiro -- curated a group show, "Cosmic Architecture," that's up at Artists Wanted Gallery (25-25 44th Drive, LIC, Queens). The show has works by Maya Hayuk, Matt Jones, Max Gleason and more and it's up until June 17. Unfortunatly, MoMa PS1 won't be starting their Saturday Warm Up series of parties until July 7, but you still have a chance to check out the works by Lara Favaretto, Max Brand, Rania Stephan and Francis Stark, all of which are up until the end of May.

Finally, head to the Museum of Sex (233 Fifth Avenue) for the interesting group show "F*ck Art." The museum invited 20 international street artists to show their existing work or to create new works on their third floor. You'll find several NSFW pieces by artists including AIKO, Mode 2, Rostarr, JMR and Miss Van.

One Direction Play The Beacon Theatre:
One of two Memorial Day Weekend shows by mega-popular British boy band One Direction. They'll play one show at 3pm and another at 8. [via nymag]

Chrome Canyon at Tribeca Grand:
Former Apes and Androids keyboardist Morgan Z is set to release his super-synthy debut album, Elemental Themes this summer and is playing tonight at the Tribeca Grand with DJs Le Chen and Will Roan. [GrandLife]

SUNDAY, MAY 27th





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Zombie Crawl: Head to Williamsburg to eat some braaains this weekend during the NYC Zombie Crawl. Start at Trash Bar to get zombie-ified or go across the street to Grand Victory for a free performance by Misfits cover band Skeletal Life. The crawl kicks off at 6pm, walking down Bedford Ave. to McCarren Park, which will have contests, raffles and giveaways.  Various neighborhood bars will be hosting performances, parties, burlesque shows and "Hot Zombie" contests throughout the night. [via Village Voice]

Raspberry Brothers do Labyrinth at Nitehawk: The Brooklyn comics host a Labyrinth sing-a-long -- in other words, get ready to belt out some Bowie. [via Nitehawk]

Beach Party with Tom Middleton and M.A.N.D.Y.:
Head to the Beekman Beer Garden Beach Club for a techno-house dance party. [via Village Voice]

Mets Vs. Phillies: What's more summery than watching a baseball game? Plus, the Mets-Phillies series is sort of intense right now, considering that the Mets swept the last Phillies series (the first time they've done so in six years). Anyway, hot dogs! Beer! Sun! Go Mets! [VillageVoice]

The Goonies at Nitehawk:
In case Labyrinth sing-a-longs are not your thing, Nitehawk will also be screening beloved 80s classic, The Goonies. [via Nitehawk]


MONDAY, MAY 28th


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NYC Beaches Open: Pack a swimsuit and sunscreen because the city's public beaches -- including Rockaway Beach, Jacob Riis Park Beach, Coney Island and Staten Island's Cedar Grove Beach -- open today. [via Time Out/Curbed]

ISO Symphonic Band at Green-Wood Cemetary: The ISO Symphonic Band, an orchestra made up of some the city's most gifted students, will play works composed by artists buried at Green-Wood. Food and drinks will be on hand for purchase as well as a trolley available for tours of the grounds post-show.  Reservations here. [via Brooklyn Based]

145th Annual Memorial Day Parade: The oldest annually held Memorial Day march in the country kicks off in Bay Ridge and ends with a wreath-laying ceremony and 21-gun salute in John Paul Jones Park. [via Time Out]

Talib Kweli at Le Poisson Rouge: Talib Kweli kicks off his Prisoner of Conscious tour tonight in support of his upcoming album with the same name. Out this summer, Prisoner of Conscious features appearances from Kendrick Lamar, Melanie Fiona, RZA and Busta Rhymes (mayhaps some of them will be there tonight?). With J. Pender and Bajah + the Dry Eye Crew. [LePoissonRouge]

The 30th Anniversary of "Planet Rock" by Afrika Bambaataa: Say planet rock, it's the sure shot! Afrika Bambaataa celebrates the 30th anniversary of his seminal 1982 hip-hop Jam with an evening including appearances by Pharaohe Monch, DJ Maseo of De La Soul,  Kool Bob Love, DJ Skribble, Todd Terry, DJ Rich Medina, DJ Hektek, Consequence, PC Manpower and Ali Shaheed Muhammad of A Tribe Called Quest. [Via nymag]

New York Philharmonic Free Concert: The Philharmonic performs Mahler's Symphony No. 9 during its annual free show held at The Cathedral Church of Saint John the Divine. [via nymag]
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