The story also includes porn star/John Waters ingenue Traci Lords and, for the signature additional PAPER layer of WTF-ness, Monica Lewinsky. Keep you eyes peeled for the ever-more-fabulous Simon Doonan, Cindy Crawford (who still looks amazing) and Amy Sedaris (who wins for best facial expression) as well.
Enjoy your blast-from-the-past fill for the day.

Ashton Kutcher wears a tank top by D&G, shorts by Nike.
Cindy Crawford wears a shirt by United Bamboo, pants by Dickies belt by Polo Jeans Co., hat by Triple Five Soul.
Monica Lewinsky wears a coat by Olivia Eaton, stockings by Hotel Venus, shoes by Todd Oldham archive. Dog's cape by Olivia Eaton. Simon Doonan wears a suit, shirt, necktie and sunglasses from Screaming Mimi's.
Amy Sedaris wears a bustier, skirt, and shoes by Betsy Johnson.
Traci Lords wears a dress, bra and shoes by Dolce & Gabbana, gloves by La Crasia, broach by Eugenia Kim.
Alicia Silverstone wears a shirt by Helmut Lang, skirt by Marc Jacobs, bra by Calvin Klein Underwear, gloves by La Crasia, sunglasses by Christian Dior.
Amy Sedaris wears a bustier, skirt, and shoes by Betsy Johnson.
Traci Lords wears a dress, bra and shoes by Dolce & Gabbana, gloves by La Crasia, broach by Eugenia Kim.