Cocaine Blues
By PAPERMAG Editors
And now a report from our special correspondent Gary Pini...
Stop whatever you're doing and run to the nearest deli and buy all their cans of Cocaine energy drink. The manufacturer has caved to pressure -- from just about everybody -- and announced yesterday that they would pull it from the marketplace. Already banned in several states and countries and all 7-Elevens, the self described "Legal Alternative" has fallen victim to its own marketing campaign and will change the name after receiving a letter from the FDA claiming that they were pushing it as a legal alternative to the real thing. Three cans are already up on eBay and at press time, the price was $35.07 with 11 bids. As the seller/budding-copy- writer says: "Banned by the Man!"
Your Comment
Posted at 2:11 on May 09, 2007
Thats weird...some guy I work with is somehow involved with this drink....and was passing them out before they hit the market.....I may get some now before they are gonE...
Posted at 10:23 on Jul 27, 2007
i think its an absolute dyer disgrace how they are being banned before hitting the marketplace, its perfect to solution 2 help aid th use of cocaine x
Posted at 3:49 on Jul 30, 2007
I have had the drink. Its not bad, it tastes like strawberry and then the after taste has the kick of...I dont know, something peppery...lol. I didnt mind it but I didnt really feel much from the drink either. I got more from an AMP energy drink than I did from the "Cocaine" energy drink. Dont get me wrong, it was a good drink....they shouldnt be banned!
Posted at 3:45 on Aug 06, 2007
I've had several cans of Cocaine when I was attending Anthrocon 2007 in Pittsburgh, and I would like to say that the stuff is really good, even though it had this serious cinnamon-like burn on the way down, so I had to practically slam the can in a single gulp.
Mix it with a bottle of Bawls and you got yourself a nice helping of Swollen Bawls. It's fruit punch with a kick!
Even though I'm a Canadian citizen, it saddens me to see that wonderful products like this get banned off the market just because it's named after a drug in the eyes of the United States government. What's next, banning Full Throttle because some kids drink 15 cans of the stuff and went off on a psycho killing state? It already sucks that Dew Fuel, a caffeinated version of Mountain Dew, which was sold across Canada, had to be taken off the market. Why? Why do people pull shit like this?
I'll agree with Josh that the drink shouldn't be banned. It's just a name.
Posted at 8:45 on Aug 11, 2007
i dont ever agree with the law i think its crap and the goverment are shit they all over egzagerate
Posted at 4:26 on Aug 17, 2007
oh well at least the government is keeping a good flow of el puro cocaine here so grab a razor n lets buck sum lines son.
Posted at 2:13 on Nov 27, 2007
I got that 3 for 1 and I think that coke is a money maker
Posted at 1:00 on Jul 06, 2008
hhahahaha,thts hilariousss..
amazingg...
love ittt..
Posted at 4:56 on Jul 12, 2008
i luved the drink and i think it was good 4 users. it is crap that they had 2 ban it, its jst a name!
Posted at 12:56 on Aug 30, 2008
"Egzagerate"? Really? "Exaggerate". I had to point that out before going on, I apologize. I tend to disagree with the government myself but your argument would sound FAR more intelligent if it were coherent.
Perhaps we should be more concerned about people being so gullible that they would actually believe that this was a legal version of the drug being sold on the shelves. Investment in education would probably help the world more than pulling a product whose name was clearly meant to be satirical.
Posted at 1:06 on Nov 24, 2008
I say funk the police! Forget the FDA its all bout the nwa
Posted at 9:05 on Nov 25, 2008
why do u guys care so uch??????
Posted at 8:56 on Dec 07, 2008
oh please people. this drink is ridiculous.
who in their right mind would call an energy drink 'cocaine'?
it's like selling lollies in pill form at the corner shop called 'ecstasy'.
This might be the most childish name for a drink i've ever heard. i'm glad this drink was taken off the market, it's not showing maturity or setting an good example for the younger generations.
grow up, please.
Posted at 8:28 on Jan 24, 2009
"why do u guys care so much??????" Posted at 9:05 p.m. ET on Nov 25, 2008 by bob. Well bob the reason people care so much is because if a simple can of Cocaine can be banned then whats next Television, clothing, etc...Basically all I'm saying that this goes along with the whole freedom of speech package.
Posted at 2:53 on Jan 25, 2009
LOL... this shit is crazy, yet so funny!
Posted at 9:47 on Jul 17, 2009
what kind of people r u why would u name this drink cocaine i would sue u guys if i wasnt just 13
Posted at 10:11 on Nov 02, 2009
whats peoples problem its not like they are made to take or drink anything its their personal choice the goverment can f*** right of!!!
Posted at 10:05 on Mar 02, 2010
i think that you are all pussies wow its a drink "i dont want to try it becuase it has a weird name" boo hoo get over and move on in life i love thiis drink and im drinking it at dacula high school woooooooooooooooooooow mmmmm so goood get you some mother fuckers
Posted at 10:25 on May 26, 2010
I have 15 cans of the old school cans of Cocaine. If anyone wants then just email me and make me a fair offer. shipping is 16.95 I will ship and you will recive in 2 days. Payment must be made frist. I'm at jewellover2002@yahoo.com